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Knuckleheads in the News

Monday - 9/1/2014, 5:33am  ET

Winner: B

November 19, 2012

A) An Ohio man who needed just one more joint. A judge gave the 19-year-old the chance to avoid prison if he gave up marijuana. He said he'd try, but he asked to smoke one last time. Needless to say, the deal went up in smoke.

B) A Virginia man who tried to rob a bank, and was very patient in the process. The 43-year-old handed an employee a note asking for money, then took a seat. Police arrested the unarmed suspect. He's being charged with attempted robbery.

C) A New York man who asked about where he could get a forklift to steal a truckload of iPad Minis. He talked about the shipment of Minis and the forklift with coworkers before he helped steal almost two million dollars worth of tablets. He was tracked down by the FBI.

Winner: A

November 12, 2012

A) A DC man who broke into a home wearing an ankle bracelet. The 18-year-old entered the home of an elderly woman, beat her up and stole her computer. The G- P-S bracelet placed him at the scene of the crime. The woman is okay, except for some bumps and bruises.

B) An Ohio woman who got caught driving past a stopped school bus on the sidewalk. The 32-year-old was video taped by the bus driver. A judge ordered her to wear a sign that says "only an idiot would drive on the sidewalk to avoid the school bus" as part of her punishment.

C) A Delaware bank robber who made a getaway before running out of gas. The crook's empty car was spotted on the side of the road by state troopers. They arrested him when he came back carrying a can of gas.

Winner: B

November 5, 2012

A) An Ohio woman who broke into a home to clean. The 53-year-old washed some coffee cups, took out the trash, vacuumed and dusted before leaving a 75 dollar bill for her services on a napkin. She pled guilty to attempted burglary.

B) Two suspected smugglers who tried to illegally cross the border by driving over the fence. They built a ramp over the 14-foot-tall border fence and tried to drive a SUV up and over. The Jeep got stuck at the top and the suspects fled back to Mexico on foot.

C) A Canadian cop who tried to bum a beer from a woman he had arrested for drunk driving. The officer text messaged the woman offering to forget everything at trial if she bought him a brew. He's under investigation.

Winner: C

October 22, 2012

A) An Arizona man who broke up a fight on train using a samurai sword. Two men where jumping a third passenger when the man pulled the sword out. He chased them attackers off the train, but didn't hurt anyone.

B) A Florida man who was dealing on the black market in dinosaur bones. The 38 year old stole a T-Rex skeleton from Mongolia that was auctioned off for a million dollars in May. He is charged with smuggling bones and faces 35 years in prison.

C) A Bosnian scrap metal thief who stole a 40-foot bridge. The 29 year old dragged it to his home and stashed it in his front yard. The bridge weighed several tons.

Winner: C

October 15, 2012

A) An elderly couple in Britain who unknowingly grew a marijuana plant in their backyard. The couple thought they bought a regular bush at a flea market and planted it in their backyard. Police said it was the largest pot plant they'd ever seen.

B) A Virginia man who was drunk when he went looking for a job as a truck driver. The 51-year-old was also driving without a license, which had been taken from him for another DUI arrest. He was sentenced to more than 2 years in prison.

C) Florida governor Rick Scott who gave people looking for information on a meningitis outbreak the number to a phone sex hotline. He was trying to send them the Florida Department of Health, but was off by one digit.

Winner: B

October 8, 2012

A) A Michigan man whose crime fighting interfered with a police investigation. The 33 year old was dressed as Batman and refused to leave the scene of an accident. The man was making it hard for the police to conduct an investigation. He was arrested and part of his probation forbids him from wearing costumes.

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