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Knuckleheads in the News

Monday - 9/15/2014, 9:17am  ET

Winner: C


November 26, 2012

A) A Florida woman who was arrested for joy-riding a manatee. A picture of the 53 year old riding the endangered animal popped up online over the summer. She turned herself in when she saw the photo. She's charged with a second-degree misdemeanor for bothering a manatee.

B) A London man who climbed a statue by the prime minister's house in his birthday suit. The man went up and down the piece a few times, even balancing on the head at one point. Police eventually got him down.

C) A Connecticut real estate agent who was taking down the competition by snagging opponents' lawn signs. The 54 year old stole more than 6 posts from area homes. He is being charged with larceny and criminal trespassing.

Winner: B


November 19, 2012

A) An Ohio man who needed just one more joint. A judge gave the 19-year-old the chance to avoid prison if he gave up marijuana. He said he'd try, but he asked to smoke one last time. Needless to say, the deal went up in smoke.

B) A Virginia man who tried to rob a bank, and was very patient in the process. The 43-year-old handed an employee a note asking for money, then took a seat. Police arrested the unarmed suspect. He's being charged with attempted robbery.

C) A New York man who asked about where he could get a forklift to steal a truckload of iPad Minis. He talked about the shipment of Minis and the forklift with coworkers before he helped steal almost two million dollars worth of tablets. He was tracked down by the FBI.

Winner: A


November 12, 2012

A) A DC man who broke into a home wearing an ankle bracelet. The 18-year-old entered the home of an elderly woman, beat her up and stole her computer. The G- P-S bracelet placed him at the scene of the crime. The woman is okay, except for some bumps and bruises.

B) An Ohio woman who got caught driving past a stopped school bus on the sidewalk. The 32-year-old was video taped by the bus driver. A judge ordered her to wear a sign that says "only an idiot would drive on the sidewalk to avoid the school bus" as part of her punishment.

C) A Delaware bank robber who made a getaway before running out of gas. The crook's empty car was spotted on the side of the road by state troopers. They arrested him when he came back carrying a can of gas.

Winner: B


November 5, 2012

A) An Ohio woman who broke into a home to clean. The 53-year-old washed some coffee cups, took out the trash, vacuumed and dusted before leaving a 75 dollar bill for her services on a napkin. She pled guilty to attempted burglary.

B) Two suspected smugglers who tried to illegally cross the border by driving over the fence. They built a ramp over the 14-foot-tall border fence and tried to drive a SUV up and over. The Jeep got stuck at the top and the suspects fled back to Mexico on foot.

C) A Canadian cop who tried to bum a beer from a woman he had arrested for drunk driving. The officer text messaged the woman offering to forget everything at trial if she bought him a brew. He's under investigation.

Winner: C


October 22, 2012

A) An Arizona man who broke up a fight on train using a samurai sword. Two men where jumping a third passenger when the man pulled the sword out. He chased them attackers off the train, but didn't hurt anyone.

B) A Florida man who was dealing on the black market in dinosaur bones. The 38 year old stole a T-Rex skeleton from Mongolia that was auctioned off for a million dollars in May. He is charged with smuggling bones and faces 35 years in prison.

C) A Bosnian scrap metal thief who stole a 40-foot bridge. The 29 year old dragged it to his home and stashed it in his front yard. The bridge weighed several tons.

Winner: C

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